--------------------------------------------------- Message sent by SqTool version 12 --- SQtools * Origin: -GG/W18- (2:313/37.79) --------------- FIDO MESSAGE AREA==> TOPIC: 255 TAGLINES Ref: F4A00002 Date: 04/05/98 From: GOTTFRIED GIDALY Time: 08:21am \/To: ALL (Read 2 times) Subj: Taglines --------------------------------------------------- [Begin Tags] How many light bulbs does it take to change a comedian? How many of these Lotto numbers do we need? - Mike How much should the groom spend on a ring? More than he can afford? How sweet! Long-stemmed....stems? -- Margaret to Frank How many surrealists does it take to change a lightbulb? How many bits could a bitblit blit if a bitblit could blit bits? How to Party American Style, by Al Cohol How many Rubber Chickens does it take to screw in a lightbulb? How quaint, the keyboard How many people does it take to change a searchlight bulb? How much is that Doggy in the Survey? Woof! Woff! How much can I get away with and still go to heaven How much longer are you going to abuse our patience? How much wanton sex can you have with a redhead & still go to heaven?? How many believe in Telekinesis? Raise MY hand! How to annoy a Unitarian: burn a question mark on his lawn How to confuse an intellectually superior being? There's no such thing How is it that you're able to go out on a limb whenever you see a light How to Cook a Steak, by Porter House How many of you believe in telekinesis? Raise MY hand! How shall I hold my soul that it may not be touching yours? How the deuce d'you deduce that? How many children must die before life is fully respected? How long should a man's legs be? Long enough to reach the ground. --Lincoln How many licks DOES it take to get to the center? How many Borg does it take to screw in a lightbulb? A: All of them How to get everyone's attention....Make a mistake How nice it is to do nothing, and then rest How long will a man lie in space ere he rot? Ham. 5.1.163 How long halt ye between two opinions.? - 1 Kings 18:21 How to Tour the Prison: Robin Steele How right can you be and still stay alive? How limp are we talking? - Gryphontamer How to have a successful garden: Weed it and reap How often must we practice sex before it is safe? How to get rich books are now filed under FICTION How much is that window in the doggie? How much do I love my friends? There's not enough numbers to count! How many times *has* the bible been translated? How much tamer can you get? How much for a Golden Shower on Sen. Packwood? How to keep your conference On Topic by Mod R. Ator How long since you've slept in a comfortable bed? - Kira How many condoms did your kid get in school today? How many Pentium designers does it take to screw in a light bulb? 1.94 How many times do I have to tell you... (I forgot what it was)!! How many Starfighters are left ? - Including you? - Yes -One How to Cut Grass, by Lon Moore How many years did it take you to become so ignorant, @TOFIRST@? How to Upgrade to MS-DOS 6.0 from OS/2 - MS-DOS 6.0 manual (1993) How much would it cost to downgrade to Turbo C--? How many licks does it take to get your juices flowing? How to hike the longest Trail by Carrie Mee How many times--have I told you--DO NOT TOAST THE MAYOR! How to get a $10 million fortune? Start with $20 million How many Borgs does it take to change a lightbulb? -- None, illumination is irrelevant How many believe in the Force? Raise MY hand! How many lightbulbs does it take to screw in a blonde? How many dings you got in your door, Tom? Ten, Tom replied decadently How much is that velvet dress in the window?!!?? Save...save... save How to know your a Deadhead: Your cassette labels have only dates How much dilithium are we talking about? - Janeway How long will a floating point operation float? How much jelly can a peanut butter sandwich hold? How many witches does it take to change a light bulb? Into what? How many marriages were there before God created the first minister? How to make Windows faster ?? *Throw* it harder !!! How many times do you have to kill him?! - Mulder How much do hard drive mufflers cost? How much memory have I got? 1 brain, 1 memory! How many years can you get for recipe Theft? How should I know, I just made it up. - Quark How many weeks in a light year? How is he? Seska Not very good. Kes How long have you had this delusion that you're human? - Hawkeye How to keep a moron in suspense: Coming next tagline How much Brien does DS9 have? They have Miles O'Brien! How many people work here? About half How many think I'm right? Wrong? How many don't think?! How is 'education' supposed to make me feel smarter? - Homer How to Pop Tarts work? -Joel as dull looking college girl How long will the wind blow? Until I die How many pinheads can dance on an angel? How is a woman like an airplane? Both have cockpits How to get Windows to work! DEL *.* How many blonds does it take to write a tagline? How many times do I have to say this? I HATE the New York Rangers!!! How to destroy a Borg.... Give him KIRADOS 6 How many Vulcans does it take to change a light bulb? Exactly 1.00000 How much memory have you got? One brain, one memory How perfectly brilliant of you. - Lwaxana How to I get out of this tagline editor? How to demoralize a Klingon - tell him he's cute How much would you pay for this Ginsu switchblade? -- Crow How long have you been my doppleganger? -- Tom Servo How long will it be before we all "just get in the way?" How good do you have to be to qualify as good? - - Calvin How the heck do you write a sea chanty anyway? How priceless are these things? How many husbands have I had? You mean apart from my own? Zsa Zsa [End Tags] --------------------------------------------------- Message sent by SqTool version 12 --- SQtools * Origin: -GG/W18- (2:313/37.79) --------------- FIDO MESSAGE AREA==> TOPIC: 255 TAGLINES Ref: F4A00003 Date: 04/05/98 From: GOTTFRIED GIDALY Time: 08:22am \/To: ALL (Read 2 times) Subj: Taglines --------------------------------------------------- [Begin Tags] How many Dittoheads can fit on the [Repeat] Key ? How to Cook a Steak: Porter House How much Brian does DS9 have? They have Miles O'Brien! How many kleptomaniacs does it take... Hey, where's the light bulb? How in the world could buffalo fly with those little tiny wings? How long a minute is depends upon which side of the bathroom door you're on How many Klingons does it take to change a lightbulb? How many Floridians does it take to change a light bulb? Both of 'em How long before the announcement is made? - Sheridan How sharper than a serpent's tooth it is to have a thankless child. - Shakespeare How long before we're as dumb as computers? How to destroy a borg?! Send then a Mac How many amino acids can dance on the head of a pin? How to Campaign, by 'May Orr' How to ID a blind guy on a nudist beach? It's not up! How is Cthulhu pronounce? As quietly as possible How is Cthulhu pronounced? As quietly as possible How much can I get away with & still go to heaven? How many wheels does a menstrual cycle have? How to Draw: Ellis Strait How to Annoy: Aunt Agonize How good is the self-service around here? How much wood can a woodchuck chuck? How many days till Christmas? How many hard drives does it take to dim the lights? How much do you smoke? Oh, about a house a day - Tom How much deeper would the ocean be without sponges How is this for diplomacy----Shoot them all! How long will you be gone? The whole time How many witches to change a bulb? Depends. Into what? How many people believe in Telekinesis ? Raise MY hand ! How many blondes does it take to make choc chip cookies? How many babies can a motherboard have? How many signatures does it take to petition an element?? How old are you, Bevis? -- Butthead How to be a Marine: Kick their'sCover your'sKiss the General's How many lawyer jokes are there? One. Rest are true How many sex-restricted jobs require a penis or a vagina? How many sacks did the Argos' offensive line allow in '94? How many years do you get for shooting the tagline warden? How long is a short circuit? How to defend yourself against a Banana How to have fun with a Klingon. Put Tribbles in his shorts How many acrylics died to make that sweater? How little you understand us, Captain. Ayelborne How sharper than a serpent's tooth is a thankless child How to get a-head in life: carry a long, sharp sword How much to downgrade to Turbo C-- ? How much would you pay for the Ginzu switchblade? - Crow How much is that wookie in the window? How is she, Chief? - Sisko How many rooks would a book nook cook if a book nook could cook rooks? How to accelerate a Mac: 100m-9.6m/s/s How many priests are needed for a Boston Mass? How to Destroy the Borg: Give them a copy of MS-Windows! How to catch a plane First you dig a hole How many licks does it take to get to the center of a golf ball? How many bits did a bitmap map, if a bitmap did map bits? How to get rid of the Borg: let them assimilate Packleds How many lawyer jokes are there? Three- the rest are true stories How pregnant sometimes his replies are! How to Lose Weight - by X. R. Sizemore How low am I, thou painted maypole? Speak - How low am I? * Shakespeare How many roads must a man walk down before you can call him a cab How many lawyers can roof a house? How thin can you slice 'em? How many HitPoints for a GreenDragon sting in the midst of plenty, DM? How strong the steel, how quick the conquest. --Mixmaster How much can happen in 10 seconds? A lot. It is a tactical design flaw How to Write a Will, by Ben E. Factor How long a minute is depends on which side of the bathroom door you're on How many "coming men" has one known! Where on earth do they all go to? How old is Forty? 40 Years = 14,610 Days How many blondes does it take to screw in a light bulb? If only How to Succeed in School: Rita Book How many city workers does it take to screw in a light? How sharper than a serpent's tooth it is to have a thankless hound How many years do you get for grand theft tagline? How many GIF's can you fit on your hard drive anyway? How long for Sleepwalker to climb stairs? He's on step two, today! How many ways are there to painfully die on this planet, @TOFIRST@? How old is Fifty? (Never mind!) How much for that fair maiden, Mr. Dragon? How many folk-tales..could eat a Scout Leader and a biologist?"FM 3x22 How many priests are needed in Boston Mass? How many lawyer jokes are there? 3. The rest are fact! How many taglines does that make now? How little Man himself has changed. - Khan How many tentacles has Great Cthulhu got? Too many How many years can you get for Tagline Theft? How many Borg does it take to screw in a light bulb? ALL How old are you, Beavis? - Butt-Head How much dough would a low crow stow if a low crow could stow dough? How have your stools been? - Crow How to irritate a Klingon - put a Tribble in his shorts How is a Yugo and a cold similar: You can catch both on foot How is your Kurtosis? How many lives is our country worth - and whose? How many angels can dance on the head of a pun? How the years go by when it's all in a days work How much flour can you grind in the Windmill of your mind? [End Tags] --------------------------------------------------- Message sent by SqTool version 12 --- SQtools * Origin: -GG/W18- (2:313/37.79) --------------- FIDO MESSAGE AREA==> TOPIC: 255 TAGLINES Ref: F4A00004 Date: 04/05/98 From: GOTTFRIED GIDALY Time: 08:21am \/To: ALL (Read 2 times) Subj: Taglines --------------------------------------------------- [Begin Tags] How many Rush fans does it take to screw in a lightbulb? How sentimental. -- Magenta How to know you're a Redneck--Your cousin becomes your wife How many people here know about the Maniac? Oh, what - nobody? How many lawyer jokes are there? One: the rest are truths How many does it take to screw in a light bulb? How long do I hold him here? - Odo Forever. - Sisko How is the amount of child support determined? How prove you that, in the great heap of your knowledge? How many Usenet users does it take to change a light bulb? Read the FAQ How many weeks are there in a light year? How many lawyer jokes? 3, the rest are true stories How much wind would a wind chill chill if a wind chill How much weight does it take to buckle a swash? How old is Forty? 40 Years = 1,262,304,000 Seconds How important is cost in choosing a lawyer? How long could this possibly take? - Charlene on Equal Opportunity How many people get eaten while hand feeding alligators? How to backup your hard drive under OS/2: Remove the hard drive How long 'til this bird hatches ? How much does a bird who eats like a bird eat? How terribly ironic. -Brain How many @TOLAST@'s does it take to screw in a light bulb? How often are we to die before we go off this stage? How is my lawyers secretary important to me? How many Lawyers does it take to screw up a light bulb? How horrible. Hitler was right about Homosexualsc'est la guere! How long a minute is depends on which side of the bathroo How long before they reach the entrance? Sisko 26 minutes. - Kira How many peas in a pod, HAL? How many times do I have to tell you, Jack - GET A LIFE!!! How many years did it take you to become so ignorant, @FN@? How many times have I told you: NOT IN THE CASTLE!!!!!!!!! How much must we practice sex before it is safe? How much fame would a name game gain if a name game could gain fame? How many witches to change a light bulb? Depends on what How it should look How long can I stay away before it's too late to come back? How many corners does a round building have? -- Harlan Ellison How long *does* it take to cook Jello? How many toes did you say it has? How to make 150 old ladies say the "F' Word? Yell "Bingo" How to Read a Book, by Paige Turner How many Zen Masters does it take a light bulb to change? How old is Rick Stiener in dog years? How much would you charge to haunt a house? How often do these things grow anyway? How many Mankinds do you see in there, Jake? - Lawler to J. Roberts How remarkable you are gunslinger! How indomitable! - Walter How long can a man live without brains? How old are you? How many witches to does it take change the bulb? Depends. Into what? How old would you be if you didn't know how old you were? How many different ways do you want me to tell the same story? How odd-CIA also means Culinary Institute of America, Hmmmm How many hardware engineers does it take to change a lightbulb? None: "We'll fix it in software." How many men does it take to screw in a light bulb? - 1 Men will screw How many miles to Avalon? None, I say, and all How many of God's laws does this violate? - Crow How many years has he been here? - Scully How many Vorlons does it take to change a lightbulb? Yes How long does this go on? -- Tom Servo How many fond fools serve mad jealousy! -- Shakespeare How many of you are Psionicists? Raise MY hand! How many licks does it take to get to the center of a frozen cat? How much for the cat's toy? How much ground can a groundhog hog? How many people rely only on E.T.net for their information!? How many ways are there to painfully die on this planet? How old is Forty? 40 Years = 21,038,400 Minutes How many fond fools serve mad jealousy! - Shak How to Get Rich Quick by Robin Banks, Jack Potts, & Kermit Grimes How many Wiccans? Four. One for each direction How much tin can a tin can tin? How to get even with your gynecologist: Throw your voice How much dirt do you need? - Doc How long do you expect it to take? - Sisko How much does a Janeway? How much intelligence do you need to sneak up on a leaf? How to make Kleenex dance? Blow a little boogie in it How many people DOES it take to unscrew a computer? How many enemies have you wiped out with the touch of a button? How time flies, when you are in a heap of problems How long can I survive on radio against this new monster? Groucho Marx How much wood did Peter Piper pick.. no, wait How many wings does a cow have? Tacky the Penguin How should I know? I'm an actor not a doctor! ...DeForest Kelley How kin ya' apologize t' de blized? How many soldiers does it take to change a light bulb? How fortunate! This will simplify everything! How many Hail Marys was that for sleeping with your wife? How many times have we heard it? That is the sad thing How low am I, thou painted maypole? Speak - How low am I? How many Borgs does it take to change a fuse? -- None, resistance is futile How many men did we lose, Bones? - Kirk How much would my head weigh if it were veal? - Gavin How long have you been my doppleganger? - Tom How often do lesbian vampires meet? Every 28 days! How revolting! - Margaret. I have every reason to revolt. - Hawk How many of THIS random selection have you seen? How much damage does being sat on by a dragon do? [End Tags] --------------------------------------------------- Message sent by SqTool version 12 --- SQtools * Origin: -GG/W18- (2:313/37.79)