--------------- FIDO MESSAGE AREA==> TOPIC: 255 TAGLINES Ref: EGQ00009 Date: 12/20/97 From: IVY IVERSON Time: 09:10pm \/To: RICKY FOLTZ (Read 2 times) Subj: [4/6] Tags >>> Part 4 of 6... If I could reach you, I would hurt you, Pinky -The Brain If my calculations are correct, and they always are... -Brain If we're to conquer the world, we must watch our cholesterol. -Brain If you can't say something nice, you're probably at the icecapades. In fact, you're kinda weird. -Wakko In the depths of your ignorance, what do you want? -Brain Is someone stuck in the drum? -Yakko It must be inordinately taxing to be such a boob. -Brain IT WORKS!! IT WORKS!!! -Wakko It's a better sound than he'd ever make as a singer! -Yakko It's a running gag. -Dot It's broken. -Wakko It's hard being the strong one...... HELLOOO, NURSE!!! -Dot It's over. Definitely over. It's over. Go away! It's the moderator! - Wakko Our new special friend! -Yakko It's the perfect size, Yakko! -Dot It's time again for another Good Idea/Bad Idea It's time for another Good Idea/Bad Idea... (Animaniacs) It's time to learn today's lesson. -Yakko It's too quiet! -Dot JAPANESE ANIMATION: 101 Ways To Blow Up The Earth Just a little thing I do. -Dot Just a sec, Brain, I think I'm finally getting somewhere! -Pinky Just one little kiss? I promise I've had all my shots! -Yakko Justice isn't blind... she's cross-eyed! -Yakko Warner Karaoke? Sounds like a dessert. - Wakko Or a disease. -Dot Kasumi: "Saotome no ojisama, asagohan desu yo!" Kat Fu: The martial art of cat bathing. Knight Sabers.. Sanjou! Lather. Wakko Rinse. Dot Repeat. Yakko Let me do the talking. -Yakko Let me think... Don't hurt yourself, Pinky. LET'S - GET - DANGEROUS! DarkWing Duck Let's meet the arriving stars....OOF! -Newslady (Animaniacs) Let's plunge ahead. -Dr. Scratchensniff Lets sing the `Anvil Song.' -Yakko Life is a joke that has just begun... -Yakko Like you said- 'All's fair in love and comedy!' -BW-Yakko Look at me, I'm Heidi! Yodelayee*NARF*! -Pinky Look who's staying with us! It's our special friend! -Yakko Look! It's big fat Scotty from Star Trek! -Yakko Warner LOOK! There goes Ted Turnover! -Yakko Looks like Aaron Spelling's house. -Yakko Makes me want to write poetry - or bake a ham, I forget which. -Dot Mallets by Bashum & Warner of Beverly Hills. Man : Polka dot? Dot: If you insist... Mary had a little lamb, with mint jelly -Dot's Poetry Corner Maybe we should just write Dear Abby. -Yakko Warner Me and my over used cliches... -Rita Meet Pinky and the Brain who want to rule the universe... MINERVA.EXE running.... YAKKO.SYS and WAKKO.SYS drooling... Monkeys always look! Monkeys always look! -Yakko, Wakko, and Dot Mr. Puppet-Head's hungry. -Yakko Warner Mr. Sinatra, hold. Mr. Redford, hold. Me. -Dot Warner MWAH Goodnight, everybody!!! -Yakko My agent's going to get an `Oh-oh' upside the head! -Slappy My Father the Tuna will not be seen today... -Animaniacs My folks are gonna kill me. -Ralph (Animaniacs) My most hated anime female character: Quess Paraya My most hated anime male character: Hathaway Noah Nabiki Tendo sold me this tag line only 3,400 yen Nanako SOS, Nanako SOS! Nanako SOS, Nanako SOS! NARF -Pinky NATIONAL HEADLINE : BRAIN LEADS POLLS! Neato complete-o YIPEE! -Yakko Warner NEED MORE SAILOR MOON MERCHANDISE!!!!!!!!! Neo Tokio, Tokio Dream City! "Three, Two, One! Go!" Nice decorating! Let me guess... Satan? -Dot No dinner with Mel Gibson?! -Dot No doubt about it, we gotta get our radar checked... -Yakko NO!! Not them! Don't even say their- -Plotz You rang?! -Yakko No, it's expensive. *THAT*'s steep. -Dot [pointing to cliff] No, no. How DOOO you do! Scratchy Fine, thank you. Dot No, we're opaque. -Yakko Warner No. Do you know who I am? -Yakko No. Would you like to take a hike? -Yakko Nobody's safe 'cuz we care for none... -Wakko Now *that's* comedy! -Slappy Squirrel Now *THAT*'s a Gold Nugget! -Yakko Now and then, Aunt Slappy is just a *little* bit bitter. Of =all= the ways to die - I gotta go as SLUG BAIT... -DarkWing Of course you know, this means Warners! -Yakko Oh, I though they were supposed to land on their feet. -Yakko Oh, not the dynamite in the cake bit again! -Slappy Squirrel Oh, this is too-hip-by-far! -Goslyn Mallard Oh. Well. That's different! -Pinky OK, ok! Good pet!... -Scratchansniff Okay, I love you, bye bye! -Mindy Okay, okay - minor setback. -DarkWing Duck Once I take over the world, remind me to snub you. -Brain One is a genius, the other insane! Only if she goes too. -Yakko Only SISSIES are in color! -BW-Dot Ooh! Our new best friend! -Yakko Warner Ooh, look! It's our new best friend! -Yakko Warner Or a disease. -Dot Our new friend! -Yakko Warner Our new Special Friend... @TO@! -Yakko Our next cartoon features Slappy the Squirrel! Our very own garage. -Dot Over here! Yakko/Wakko/Dot Pavlov would love this kid. -Slappy Perhaps a sedative? -Slappy Pinky, are you pondering what I'm pondering? The Brain Pinky, I told you to stop that. -The Brain Pinky, set phasers on `conquering the universe' -Brain Pinky...are you pondering what I'm pondering? -Brain Please stop that or I'll have to hurt you. -The Brain Polka dot? - Ministers Not AGAIN! -Dot Polka Dot? Not again! Polka-dot? If you insist... Poor little evil fellow who asked for it! -Dot Warner Potty Emergency! I have a Potty Emergency! -Wakko Warner Previously on Warner Law... PROBLEM: Unsafe Sanity >>> Continued to next message... ___ Blue Wave/QWK v2.20 [NR] --- TriToss (tm) 1.03 - (Unregistered) * Origin: Ivy's WALL BBS - Sheboygan, WI 920-457-9255 (1:154/170) --------------- FIDO MESSAGE AREA==> TOPIC: 255 TAGLINES Ref: EGQ00010 Date: 12/20/97 From: IVY IVERSON Time: 09:10pm \/To: RICKY FOLTZ (Read 2 times) Subj: [5/6] Tags >>> Part 5 of 6... Promise me something, Pinky. Never breed. -Brain Pull a rabbit out of your pants! -Wakko Warner Quick, call the fashion police. -Dot Rats! *NARF* We're not rats! -Pinky Reality is for people who can't handle Anime Recess! -Yakko RETREAT! -Yakko/Wakko/Dot Rock-a-bye baby, under my tush... -Pesto Goodfeather Ruin my studio, will you.... you... you.... whatever-you-ares!!! Plotz Runt of Borg: I love it when you assimilate, Rita! Safe! -Yakko Same thing we do every night. Try to take over the world! -The Brain Save it for the Jack LaLane show! -Slappy Scratchansniff, Scratchansniff, Scratchansniff..... -Yakko/Wakko/Dot Scuse me! Excuse me! Yes, excuse me! -Wakkorotti See? My luck isn't bad! This clothesline broke my faaalll... Set three extra places, we're coming over for dinner! Show these kids the door! That's OK, we can see it from here!Yakko Show's over. Go away. -Yakko Warner Sigh. My own country bumpkin! -Dot Silence? -Dot Silly puppy! -Mindy Sire? -HelloPrimeMinisterNurse Wait till we're alone. -King Yakko SISSIES?! I'll show YOU who's a sissy.... -Wakko Sit, Ubu. Sit. Sizzling pumpkins? This is truly pathetic! -Slappy Squirrel Slappy darlin'! Is that you? If it aint, you better call my agent! Snak-y go down da hoooollle. -Baby Plucky (Animaniacs) So just sit back and relax. You'll laugh till you collapse! SOLUTION: Yakko, Wakko, and Dot Some of you may not return... the rest of you definitely won't -Yakko Something tells me we're not in Northern Wisconsin anymore... -Yakko Something that says `I'm here to destroy you' but w/ a sense of fun! Sometimes you frighten me, Pinky. -The Brain Sorry, but I'm on a low saliva diet. -Slappy Sorry... it's the chocolate talking. -Wakko Warner Spew!!! Spit bubbles are irrelevant. -Wakko Warner of Borg Spoil your dinner! -Yakko Squirming with anchovies! - Wakko Not! -Dot Steers like a dream! -Yakko Stop leading the witness! -Judge Okay, you lead. -Yakko Stop playing with my bust! -Dr. Scratchansniff Stop that, Pinky. It's very annoying. -The Brain Suck gas, evil-doers! -DarkWing Duck Sure, Brain, but how are we going to find chaps our size? Tactless -yet rude. -Slappy Take me away... But be gentle, I'm fragile. -Yakko to Nurse Take over for us! Yakko No way! Wayne/Garth Way! Yakko Teacher, teach us now! -Yakko/Wakko/Dot Tenchi Muyo Excuse #802: Taking a bath with Ryouko. Terrible puppy-children are after me. -Wally Llama THAT DOES IT!!! I say we =toast= this toad... -DarkWing Duck That was good, but.... @@@@@@@hhh, I wanna do it again! -Yakko That was very therapeutic. -Brain That went well. -Yakko That which does not kill us makes us stranger. -Goodchild/ON FLUX That'll be enough of that! -Dot That's as high as we go for this particular garage. -Yakko That's funny `Ho-Ho.' I want funny `Ha-Ha.' That's not a tagline, that's Yakko Warner carrying on again! That's OK. We just wanted the oil. -Yakko That's the last time I ever travel by bean. -Yakko That's worse than `Sweatin' to the Oldies'! -Yakko Warner The Borg assimilated the Warners.... and never recovered! The dental instrument please! Flat. -Yakko The Few.. The Perverted.. The Otaku The hotel of your mind has many vacancies. -Yakko The instrument please! -Yakko The moral of today's story is irrelevant. -Yakko Warner of Borg The part with my pet! -Dot The pleasure's been all yours, I'm sure. -Slappy The show hasn't started yet, you clueless fashion victims! -Dot The workings of your mind are a mystery to me. -Brain The `Poor Cat in the Rain' look. It never fails. -Rita THEBRAIN.EXE loaded...Will try to take over world tonight. There goes our 3 bean salad. -Dot There is no cause for alarm! But there probably will be. -The Brain There's a pick-up line if I've ever heard one. -Dot There's a shocker... -Yakko There's that fate thing again. They're @fn@, they're @fn@ and the Brain, Brain, Brain, Brain... They're... Scratchy YOUR responsibility! Plotz This has been another... ... Useless Fact. This inability to follow instructions -is it genetic or something?-DW This is a lot of tripe. You know that. -The Brain This is good. Definately good. -Runt This is KRYM, all crime, all the time. This is the uniform of a great man! Does he know you're wearing it? This looks like a job for -DarkWing Decoy! This looks like a matter of mind over mallard DarkWing Duck This means war! -Mr. Tator I thought it meant touchdown? -Yakko Those acting classes are really paying off! -Yakko Warner Throne? How do you lift the lid? -Wako Like you lift the lid. -Dot Throw 'em into this aircraft's jail! -Blowski (Animaniacs) To prove their mousy worth, they'll overthrow the Earth! Today, St. Canard...tomorrow, THE WORLD! -NegaDuck TURN OUT THOSE LIGHTS!!! -Dot Uh-oh. Definitely uh-oh. -Runt URA Animaniac if you greet every woman with Hellooooooo, Nurse! URA Animaniac if you refer to your home as the Water Tower. URA Animaniac if your mailing address is Water Tower, CA. Vampire Hunter D -One of the best anime films ever made! Veni, vidi, vaboo: I came, I saw, I've almost got it fixed! VIZ (viz) n. 1. One who charges outrageous prices for Ranma 1/2. WaCkO.ExE found... CPU behaving _very_ oddly... Wakko packs away the snacks while Bill Clinton plays the sax! WAKKO.SYS LOADED: coMputER ACtiNgg vERyy odDLyyy.... Wanna see me make bubbles with my spit? Wakko Maybe later. Yakko Want some of my mayonnaise muffin? -Dot Want to be our bunky? -Yakko Want to watch me make bubbles with my spit? -Wakko Warner Was it food, or was it Memorex? -Yakko Was that a joke? Am I missing something? -Yakko We are doomed. -Dr. Scrachansniff We can also roll over and play dead. -Yakko >>> Continued to next message... ___ Blue Wave/QWK v2.20 [NR] --- TriToss (tm) 1.03 - (Unregistered) * Origin: Ivy's WALL BBS - Sheboygan, WI 920-457-9255 (1:154/170) --------------- FIDO MESSAGE AREA==> TOPIC: 255 TAGLINES Ref: EGQ00011 Date: 12/20/97 From: IVY IVERSON Time: 09:10pm \/To: RICKY FOLTZ (Read 2 times) Subj: [6/6] Tags >>> Part 6 of 6... We gotta run. Bye! -Yakko We have no taste, but we like you. -Dot We interupt the News to show an episode of Animaniacs! We love you too! Say 'Hi' to Mom for us! -Dot We must all make sacrifices, Pinky. You may be next. -Brain We need a plan that will work! Oh, that's different. *NARF* We pay tons of income tax -The Warners We taste awful! -Wakko We're Animaniacs! We have pay-for-play contracts! We're Animaniacs, and we're zany to the max! We're from the law firm of Warner, Warner, Warner, and Mime... We're not acting. We really are like this. -Yakko We're not making this up just so we can take over the world! -Brain We're not that stupid, we just know the plot. -Yakko We're practically the size of mice, Brain. -Pinky We're stretching for the comedy here folks. -Slappy Squirrel We're zany to the max! There's baloney in our slacks! Well isn't that interesting. -Yakko Well, I never! -Woman Well, you should. It's fun! -Slappy Well, it was nice while it lasted. -Yakko Well, now we're getting into philosophy. -Yakko Well, sibs, there it is.... the Garage Sale! -Yakko Well, somebody had to do it! -Dot Well, whaddya know... it can count... -NegaDuck What a coinky-dink! -Yakko What a schmutz. -Slappy What a surprise! Runt in trouble! -Rita What are we going to do tomorrow night, Brain? Pinky What are you doing?! Torturing a clown?? -Yakko What do you want to do tonight, Brain? Pinky What if we want a plan that works?? Oh, that's different. *NARF* What kind of faces are we supposed to make? -Yakko What'd you hit my sister for? Wakko It's a little thing I do. BW-Dot What's amada? -Lady I don't know! What's AMADA with YOU? -Wakko What's that got to do with anything? -The Brain What's tonight's plan to take over the world, Brain? Pinky What? They show other stuff BESIDES Animaniacs on TV?? Wow! Whatta we going to do tomorrow night? A slumber party? Pinky Whatta yutz! -Slappy Wheeeee! Doncha just love defyin' gravity? -Dot Wheel of FIDO, turn turn turn, tell us the tagline we will learn.-Yakko Wheel of Morality, turn turn turn... -Yakko Warner Who came up with this stupid Wheel of Morality idea, anyway? -Dot Whoa! Sneakier than advertised! -Yakko With liberty and justice for all. -Yakko/Wakko/Dot Would you like anything? -Stewardess Would you like to take a survey? -Survey Ladies Yakko, is our use of falling anvils going to be a bit excessive? -Dot Yakko.EXE found. Computer now has irresistable attraction to women... YAKKO.SYS not found: etry ail ttract with NURSE.SYS? Yeah!... No, wait! The Brain Yeah, but I thought Madonna already *had* a steady bloke! -Pinky Yeah, Ralph! You make a great whoopie cushion! -Dot Yeah...I love the Wheel of Morality...*MWAH* -Wakko Yep, I found a piece o'.....GOLD!!!! (Animaniacs) Yes, Brain, but burlap chafes me so... -Pinky Yes, Brain, but where are we going to get chaps our size? Pinky You blew it, Runt. -Rita You have the recall of a lima bean, Pinky. -The Brain You know you're in trouble when AEON FLUX starts making sense! You know, you should meet my pet... -Dot Warner You mean Lyle Wagner is here? -Pinky You remind me of a very young Betty Boop. -Slappy Squirrel You remind me of a young @N@... -Slappy Squirrel You shrink all the TV's and everyone gets all squinty-eyed? Pinky You watch too much TV, Pinky. -Brain You were doing 55.00026 mph in a 55 mph zone! -Officer (Animaniacs) You write drivel unfit for a lightbulb commercial. -The Brain You'll never live to regret it! -Yakko You're on a roll, Brain! *ZOINK* -Pinky Yume Senshi Wingman -The Last and Gentle Soldier of Peace -- ,-----> Ivy's WALL BBS Home of Lakeshore Net <-----, |--------------> Ivy Iverson, KB9QPM/AE <------------| `-> Netmail me a request for info on Lakeshore Net <-' ___ Blue Wave/QWK v2.20 [NR] --- TriToss (tm) 1.03 - (Unregistered) * Origin: Ivy's WALL BBS - Sheboygan, WI 920-457-9255 (1:154/170) --------------- FIDO MESSAGE AREA==> TOPIC: 255 TAGLINES Ref: EGQ00012 Date: 12/21/97 From: JANADA OAKLEY Time: 01:13am \/To: BORIS TERZIC (Read 2 times) Subj: Obscure humor JO> ... I brake for animals,..if they're big enough to dent my car. JO> - Duckman BT> Exquisite! Got any more Duckman tags? Sure do! Pleased to meet another Duckman fan. Wish I had more, but I'm glad to share what I have. :) Boo-friggin-hoo! - Duckman I never connected for more than a couple of minutes... - Duckman I was just joking, of course Duckman screwed up. [Duckman] I was thinkin, as much as my drunken stupor allows me to think.- Corny The butch chick is right, we've earned our freedom! [Duckman] Who going to clothe and feed and remind him to blink and swallow? Most of them became sterile after years of watching Larry King.Duckman I suggest we stop buying our transporters at K-Mart. -Cornfed, Duckman Red alert! Red Alert! Warp Factor Eleven-teen! - Captain Duckman You can stuff the Prime Directive where the sun don't shine! - Duckman We're talkin' interplanetary orgies here! - Captain Duckman "I'll be back." - Khan Chicken "Wrong franchise, sir." - Cornfed I know a variation of that, but it only works on the prostate.-Duckman I want killing, and lots of it! - Captain Duckman Jim, I'm a doctor, not a rodeo clown! - "Bones" Who's Jim? - Duckman Goodbye forever, Duckman! - Khan Chicken to Captain Duckman *BANG!* It's Khan's Chicken of Prey! - Duckman [Trek episode] Release the Khan bomb! - Chicken Khan, on Duckman The needs of the few...outweigh-..no, no, wait. - Mr. Cornfed, Duckman I understand there's a Hooter's on Rigel 7. - Captain Duckman Neener, neener, neener! I'm a stud and you're a weener! - Duckman A direct hit to the old "dilithium crystals"! - Duckman I'll be doing what I do best...running like a woman! - Duckman Damn, I just weather-stripped the patio! - Duckman Does wetting myself count as moving? - Duckman Don't respect you? ...I brought you the hand towel didn't I? - Duckman I don't know art but I know what I like..... BREATHING!! - Duckman Wait! Could you stamp my hand so I could get back in? - Duckman but why are my butt feathers standing on end? - Duckman Funny is a wiffle ball bat in the gazongas... - Duckman Sorry, I didn't hear you, I was staring at your breasts. - Duckman Easy Duckman, I know over two hundered ways to kill a man. - Cornfed I brake for animals,..if they're big enough to dent my car. - Duckman Ohh... That man makes my elbows sweat. - Bernice Duckman. Duckman with a D. In fact PHD. Loveology. - Duckman Play with tigers, you get covered in yellow hair. - Duckman Sure, when my butt starts singing show tunes. - Duckman What the hell are YOU starin' at!?! - Duckman ... It's none other than Duke Fartknocker! - Space Ghost about Mark Hamill ___ Blue Wave/QWK v2.12 * LAKOTA v1.5 --- Alexi/Mail 2.02b (#10000) * Origin: COLUMBIA SPITFIRE * Dallas, Texas * (214-275-5040) (1:124/3271) --------------- FIDO MESSAGE AREA==> TOPIC: 255 TAGLINES Ref: EGQ00013 Date: 12/20/97 From: FRED BURGESS Time: 09:51am \/To: NAVNEET JONEJA (Read 2 times) Subj: RE: HD Crash On Dec 17, 1997 05:39pm, NAVNEET JONEJA wrote to ALL: NJ> if anyonw can help me, i need taglines on.... Unable to locate Coffee -- Operator Halted! It's only a hobby ... only a hobby ... only a Press any key to continue or any other key to quit Hello, I am part number ޺۳ݳݳ This tagline stolen by Off-Line Xpress! I'm in shape ... round's a shape isn't it? Proofread carefully to see if you any words out. Mental Floss prevents Moral Decay. All wiyht. Rho sritched mg kegtops awound? Back Up My Hard Drive? I Can't Find The Reverse Switch! This tagline is umop apisdn hAS ANYONE SEEN MY cAPSLOCK KEY? There's that steam engine, now where's my camcorder??? An increase is NOT a cut. An increase is NOT a cut. Life after death? Is that like terminate and stay resident? off-topic" warnings: Add the moderator to your twitlist! * Eval Day 795 * No matter how thin you slice it, there are always t The secret of DoubleSpace: Randomly loses half your data! Joseph Stalin's grave was a Communist Plot. \/r Sڿ /\g_i Do ̹S? I'm sorry...were the voices in my head bothering you? PIBCAK?.......problem is between chair and keyboard. Cursor: ...Type "Install" and just wait a while.... Is a rose really a "deadly thorn bearing assualt flower"?!OJW Too bad life doesn't have INSERT, UNDO and DELETE keys... Problem packing TROUSER.ZIP - Replace floppy and Retry? Bathing beauty: A girl worth wading for. But you misunderstand, I am the MASTER. . . There are hits, & there are misses; & then there are *MISSES* Better is the death knell for Good Enough A cat is a terrible thing to waste... Drive safely. "Spill some acid?" - "Nope, cafeteria coffee." If Einstein were alive today, he'd run Wildcat! Don't question authority, it doesn't know either. WIN error #52: Press F46@CG(uiT)GH56%JgtqYL3 to continue: Well that went over like a pit bull in a daycare center. Unlike women, if your Motorcycle doesn't look good, you can paint it! ... Platinum Xpress & Wildcat!..... Nice!!!! --- Platinum Xpress/Win/Wildcat5! v2.0 * Origin: TCL Custom Computers- Columbus, Ohio 614-475-4997 (1:226/0) --------------- FIDO MESSAGE AREA==> TOPIC: 255 TAGLINES Ref: EGQ00014 Date: 12/20/97 From: BARRY BLAES Time: 11:53am \/To: KIM LYKKEGAARD (Read 2 times) Subj: Dupe! Whilst pondering the meaning of life Barry, saw Kim Lykkegaard post this... KL> You can get the program on: KL> http://home8.inet.tele.dk/lykkegaa/fido/ KL> The progra is called KILLDUPE.ZIP and is for DOS (32-bit) if Well Kim, I got a copy and tried it and got this in my dos window... E:\test>killdupe DOS/4GW Protected Mode Run-time Version 1.97 Copyright (c) Rational Systems, Inc. 1990-1994 DOS/4GW fatal error (1004): syntax is DOS4GW Any ideas. I can be reached at the e-mail address. From Barry Blaes, on Stardate 9712.20. E-mail: btblaes@bigfoot.com. Http://wwp.mirabilis.com/3657746 Pgp Finger Print: 1798 7D94 FB21 D1D0 DC0E A16C F11E 127C 55CC 4B68 ... Had a life once. Now I have a computer. ~~~ Tag-O-Matic V.13 I recognise the Green Frog. --- Fastecho 1.45a * Origin: The Bears Den. (1:2630/140) --------------- FIDO MESSAGE AREA==> TOPIC: 255 TAGLINES Ref: EGR00000 Date: 12/21/97 From: JON HUNT Time: 10:48am \/To: SEBASTIAN VITANGELI (Read 2 times) Subj: Barts ChalckBoard Hi Sebastian, SV> Hi All... I was wondering if someone had a partial list of Bart's SV> Chalckboard? to add it to my taglines file! :) Partial list? I'd go for the whole thing. :) Created by GetTag v1.61 (c)1997 Jon Hunt [Begin Tags] "High explosives and school don't mix" Bart on the blackboard Bart's BlackBoard: "I will not Xerox my butt" Bart's Blackboard "I am not deliciously saucy." Bart's Blackboard "No one wants to hear my armpits." Bart's Blackboard "The Good Humor man can only be pushed so far." Bart's Blackboard - "I will not do anything bad ever again." Bart's Blackboard "A burp is not an answer." Bart's Blackboard "All work and no play makes Bart a dull boy." Bart's Blackboard "Beans are neither fruit nor musical." Bart's Blackboard "Coffee is not for kids." Bart's Blackboard "Five days is not too long to wait for a gun." Bart's Blackboard "Funny noises are not funny." Bart's Blackboard "Garlic gum is not funny." Bart's Blackboard "Goldfish don't bounce." Bart's Blackboard "Hamsters cannot fly." Bart's Blackboard "High explosives and school don't mix." Bart's Blackboard "I am not a 32 year-old woman." Bart's Blackboard "I am not a dentist." Bart's Blackboard "I am not a lean mean spitting machine." Bart's Blackboard "I am not authorized to fire substitute teachers." Bart's Blackboard "I am not deliciously saucy." Bart's Blackboard "I am not the reincarnation of Sammy Davis Jr." Bart's Blackboard "I did not see Elvis." Bart's Blackboard "I do not have diplomatic immunity." Bart's Blackboard "I saw nothing unusual in the teacher's lounge." Bart's Blackboard "I will finish what I sta " Bart's Blackboard "I will never win an Emmy." Bart's Blackboard "I will not Xerox my butt." Bart's Blackboard "I will not aim for the head." Bart's Blackboard "I will not barf unless I'm sick." Bart's Blackboard "I will not belch the National Anthem." Bart's Blackboard "I will not bribe Principal Skinner." Bart's Blackboard "I will not bring sheep to class." Bart's Blackboard "I will not burp in class." Bart's Blackboard "I will not bury the new kid." Bart's Blackboard "I will not call my teacher `Hot Cakes'." Bart's Blackboard "I will not call the principal `Spud Head'." Bart's Blackboard "I will not carve gods." Bart's Blackboard "I will not celebrate meaningless milestones." Bart's Blackboard "I will not charge admission to the bathroom." Bart's Blackboard "I will not conduct my own fire drills." Bart's Blackboard "I will not cut corners." Bart's Blackboard "I will not defame New Orleans." Bart's Blackboard "I will not dissect things unless instructed." Bart's Blackboard "I will not do anything bad ever again." Bart's Blackboard "I will not do that thing with my tongue." Bart's Blackboard "I will not draw naked ladies in class." Bart's Blackboard "I will not drive the principal's car." Bart's Blackboard "I will not encourage others to fly." Bart's Blackboard "I will not expose the ignorance of the faculty." Bart's Blackboard "I will not fake my way through life." Bart's Blackboard "I will not fake seizures." Bart's Blackboard "I will not get very far with this attitude." Bart's Blackboard "I will not go near the kindergarten turtle." Bart's Blackboard "I will not grease the monkey bars." Bart's Blackboard "I will not hang donuts on my person." Bart's Blackboard "I will not hide behind the Fifth Amendment." Bart's Blackboard "I will not instigate revolution." Bart's Blackboard "I will not make flatuent noises in class." Bart's Blackboard "I will not mock Mrs. Dumbface." Bart's Blackboard "I will not pledge allegiance to Bart." Bart's Blackboard "I will not prescribe medication." Bart's Blackboard "I will not sell land in Florida." Bart's Blackboard "I will not sell miracle cures." Bart's Blackboard "I will not sell school property." Bart's Blackboard "I will not send lard through the mail." Bart's Blackboard "I will not show off." Bart's Blackboard "I will not skateboard in the halls." Bart's Blackboard "I will not sleep through my education." Bart's Blackboard "I will not snap bras." Bart's Blackboard "I will not spank others." Bart's Blackboard "I will not squeak chalk." Bart's Blackboard "I will not strut around like I own the place." Bart's Blackboard "I will not teach others to fly." Bart's Blackboard "I will not torment the emotionally frail." Bart's Blackboard "I will not trade pants with others." Bart's Blackboard "I will not use abbrev." Bart's Blackboard "I will not waste chalk." Bart's Blackboard "I will not whittle hall passes out of soap." Bart's Blackboard "I will not yell `Fire' in a crowded classroom." Bart's Blackboard "I will not yell `She's Dead' at roll call." Bart's Blackboard "I will remember to take my medication." Bart's Blackboard "I will return the seeing-eye dog." Bart's Blackboard "Indian burns are not our cultural heritage." Bart's Blackboard "It's potato, not potatoe." Bart's Blackboard "Mud is not one of the 4 food groups." Bart's Blackboard "My homework was not stolen by a one-armed man." Bart's Blackboard "My name is not Dr. Death." Bart's Blackboard "Nerve gas is not a toy." Bart's Blackboard "Next time it could be me on the scaffolding." Bart's Blackboard "No one is interested in my underpants." Bart's Blackboard "No one wants to hear my armpits." Bart's Blackboard "Nobody likes sunburn slappers." Bart's Blackboard "Organ transplants are best left to professionals." Bart's Blackboard "Spitwads are not free speech." Bart's Blackboard "Tar is not a plaything." Bart's Blackboard "Teacher is not a leper." Bart's Blackboard "The Christmas Pageant does not stink." Bart's Blackboard "The First Amendment does not cover burping." Bart's Blackboard "The Good Humor man can only be pushed so far." Bart's Blackboard "The boys room is not a water park." Bart's Blackboard "The cafeteria deep fryer is not a toy." Bart's Blackboard "The principal's toupee is not a Frisbee." Bart's Blackboard "There are plenty of businesses like show business." Bart's Blackboard "They are laughing at me, not with me." Bart's Blackboard "This is not a clue... or is it?." Bart's Blackboard "This punishment is not boring and pointless." Bart's Blackboard "Underwear should be worn on the inside." Bart's Blackboard "`Bagman' Is not a legitimate career choice." Bart's Blackboard "`Bart Bucks' are not legal tender." Bart's Blackboard "`Bewitched' does not promote Satanism." Bart's Blackboard: "'Bart Bucks' are not legal tender" Bart's Blackboard: "A burp is not an answer" Bart's Blackboard: "All work and no play makes Bart a dull boy." Bart's Blackboard: "Beans are neither fruit nor musical." Bart's Blackboard: "Coffee is not for kids" Bart's Blackboard: "Coffee is not for kids." Bart's Blackboard: "Cursive writing doesn't mean what I think it does." Bart's Blackboard: "Five days is not too long to wait for a gun." Bart's Blackboard: "Funny noises are not funny." Bart's Blackboard: "Garlic gum is not funny" Bart's Blackboard: "Goldfish don't bounce." Bart's Blackboard: "Hamsters cannot fly." Bart's Blackboard: "High explosives and school don't mix." Bart's Blackboard: "I am not a 32 year old woman" Bart's Blackboard: "I am not a dentist." Bart's Blackboard: "I am not a lean mean spitting machine." Bart's Blackboard: "I am not authorized to fire substitute teachers." Bart's Blackboard: "I am not deliciously saucy" Bart's Blackboard: "I am not deliciously saucy." Bart's Blackboard: "I am not the reincarnation of Sammy Davis Jr." Bart's Blackboard: "I did not see Elvis" Bart's Blackboard: "I did not see Elvis." Bart's Blackboard: "I do not have diplomatic immunity." Bart's Blackboard: "I saw nothing unusual in the teacher's lounge." Bart's Blackboard: "I will cut corners Bart's Blackboard: "I will finish what I sta " Bart's Blackboard: "I will never win an Emmy." Bart's Blackboard: "I will not aim for the head." Bart's Blackboard: "I will not barf unless I'm sick." Bart's Blackboard: "I will not belch the National Anthem" Bart's Blackboard: "I will not belch the National Anthem." Bart's Blackboard: "I will not bribe Principal Skinner." Bart's Blackboard: "I will not bring sheep to class." Bart's Blackboard: "I will not burp in class" Bart's Blackboard: "I will not bury the new kid." Bart's Blackboard: "I will not call the principal 'spud head.'" Bart's Blackboard: "I will not celebrate meaningless milestones." Bart's Blackboard: "I will not charge admission to the bathroom." Bart's Blackboard: "I will not claim diplomatic immunity" Bart's Blackboard: "I will not complain about the solution when I hear it." Bart's Blackboard: "I will not conduct my own fire drills." Bart's Blackboard: "I will not cut corners./'' '' '' ''/'' '' '' ''" Bart's Blackboard: "I will not defame New Orleans." Bart's Blackboard: "I will not dissect things unless instructed." Bart's Blackboard: "I will not do anything bad ever again" Bart's Blackboard: "I will not do anything bad ever again." Bart's Blackboard: "I will not do that thing with my tongue." Bart's Blackboard: "I will not draw naked ladies in class" Bart's Blackboard: "I will not drive the principal's car." Bart's Blackboard: "I will not eat things for money." Bart's Blackboard: "I will not encourage others to fly." Bart's Blackboard: "I will not expose the ignorance of the faculty." Bart's Blackboard: "I will not fake my way through life." Bart's Blackboard: "I will not get very far with this attitude Bart's Blackboard: "I will not go near the kindergarten turtle." Bart's Blackboard: "I will not grease the monkey bars" Bart's Blackboard: "I will not hang donuts on my person." Bart's Blackboard: "I will not hide behind the Fifth Amendment Bart's Blackboard: "I will not instigate revolution." Bart's Blackboard: "I will not make flatuent noises in class." Bart's Blackboard: "I will not make flatulent noises in class" Bart's Blackboard: "I will not mock Mrs. Dumbface." Bart's Blackboard: "I will not pledge allegiance to Bart." Bart's Blackboard: "I will not pledge allegience to Bart." Bart's Blackboard: "I will not prescribe medication." Bart's Blackboard: "I will not say 'Springfield' just to get applause" Bart's Blackboard: "I will not say 'Springfield' just to get applause." Bart's Blackboard: "I will not sell land in Florida" Bart's Blackboard: "I will not sell miracle cures." Bart's Blackboard: "I will not sell school property." Bart's Blackboard: "I will not send lard through the mail." Bart's Blackboard: "I will not show off" Bart's Blackboard: "I will not skateboard in the halls" Bart's Blackboard: "I will not sleep through my education" Bart's Blackboard: "I will not snap bras." Bart's Blackboard: "I will not spank others" Bart's Blackboard: "I will not spank others." Bart's Blackboard: "I will not squeak chalk" Bart's Blackboard: "I will not strut around like I own the place." Bart's Blackboard: "I will not torment the emotionally frail." Bart's Blackboard: "I will not trade pants with others." Bart's Blackboard: "I will not use abbrev." Bart's Blackboard: "I will not waste chalk" Bart's Blackboard: "I will not waste chalk." Bart's Blackboard: "I will not whittle hall passes out of soap" Bart's Blackboard: "I will not yell "Fire" in a crowded classroom" Bart's Blackboard: "I will not yell "She's Dead" during roll call" Bart's Blackboard: "I will remember to take my medication." Bart's Blackboard: "I will return the seeing-eye dog." Bart's Blackboard: "Indian burns are not our cultural heritage." Bart's Blackboard: "It's potato, not potatoe." Bart's Blackboard: "Mud is not one of the 4 food groups." Bart's Blackboard: "My homework was not stolen by a one-armed man." Bart's Blackboard: "My name is not Dr. Death" Bart's Blackboard: "My name is not Dr. Death." Bart's Blackboard: "Nerve gas is not a toy." Bart's Blackboard: "Next time it could be me on the scaffolding" Bart's Blackboard: "No one is interested in my underpants." Bart's Blackboard: "No one wants to hear my armpits." Bart's Blackboard: "Nobody likes sunburn slappers." Bart's Blackboard: "Organ transplants are best left to professionals." Bart's Blackboard: "Organ transplants are best left to the professionals" Bart's Blackboard: "Pledge of Allegiance doesn't end "Hail Satan" Bart's Blackboard: "Ralph won't "morph" if you squeeze him hard enough." Bart's Blackboard: "Spit wads are not free speech." Bart's Blackboard: "Tar is not a plaything." Bart's Blackboard: "Teacher is not a leper." Bart's Blackboard: "The Christmas Pageant does not stink" Bart's Blackboard: "The Christmas Pageant does not stink." Bart's Blackboard: "The First Amendment does not cover burping." Bart's Blackboard: "The Good Humor man can only be pushed so far." Bart's Blackboard: "The Pledge of Allegiance does not end with Hail Satan." Bart's Blackboard: "The boys room is not a water park." Bart's Blackboard: "The cafeteria deep fryer is not a toy" Bart's Blackboard: "The cafeteria deep fryer is not a toy." Bart's Blackboard: "The principal's toupee is not a Frisbee" Bart's Blackboard: "There are plenty of businesses like show business" Bart's Blackboard: "There are plenty of businesses like show business." Bart's Blackboard: "They are laughing at me, not with me" Bart's Blackboard: "They are laughing at me, not with me." Bart's Blackboard: "This punishment is not boring and pointless" Bart's Blackboard: "Underwear should be worn on the inside" Bart's Blackboard: "`Bagman' is not a legitimate career choice." Bart's Blackboard: "`Bewitched' does not promote Satanism." Bart's Blackboard: I will not hide behind the Fifth Amendment." Bart's Blackboard: I will not instigate revolution." Coffee is not for kids Bart on the blackboard Coffee is not for kids. - Bart's Blackboard High explosives and school don't mix. - Bart's Blackboard I am the fingernail that scratches the blackboard of your soul.-DW I am the fingernails that scrape the blackboard of your soul! `Bewitched' does not promote Satanism. - Bart's Blackboard [End Tags] Seeya, Jon ... Ever see a couple of dogs do it human style? --- Terminate 5.00/Pro Support FREE2000 & FOTI * Origin: Concilium Orb BBS - REC26 - +353 54 66965 - 24 Hours (2:263/500.1) --------------- FIDO MESSAGE AREA==> TOPIC: 255 TAGLINES Ref: EGR00001 Date: 12/21/97 From: PAUL JENKIN Time: 01:37pm \/To: KIM LYKKEGAARD (Read 2 times) Subj: Dupe! Scutters log stardate 9712.20 Kim muttered something about Dupe! before jumping in Starbug with the remaining crew and chasing off to the Nova 5 to rescue All... KL> It will take almost any dupe. You have some option like save KL> the dupe in a seperat file, makeing the controle case sensitiv (what KL> will alowe more dupes to get by the program). and more..... KL> It kill dupe like: KL> DON'T SHOUT -- This conference is close-captioned KL> Don't SHOUT --- This conference is close-captioned I take it that the prog involves some sort of a sorting alg? I know the main problem with Tag-O-Matics dupe checking is the prog TSort, it sorts in a case sensitive fashion, so the likes of the examples you showed would be left... Does it contain something to remove email addresses? ie the line contains '.com', '.co.nz' '.org' '.co.uk' '.net' etc Origin lines? Tear lines? eg '---' '~~~' '-!-' The '...' and '.!.' that are sometimes at the start of the line in some tagfiles? Quoted lines? eg line has 'KL>' at the beginning Maybe something to think about for the next version. It would probably slow things down a little, but could be good features to have :) Sounds like it is a good program though from what you have written here. KL> REDDWARF.TAG 36.610 23.585 I don't suppose you could post this could you? :) KL> You can get the program on: KL> http://home8.inet.tele.dk/lykkegaa/fido/ KL> The progra is called KILLDUPE.ZIP and is for DOS (32-bit) if KL> somebody ask I might make a OS/2 and/or a windows version. I don't have inet access, but if you could send it to Paul.Jenkin@johnnos.pl.net I should get it. Much Appreciated... Ciao..  Paul Jenkin aka The Legionnaire  FidoNet 3:770/215   Email Paul.Jenkin@johnnos.pl.net   http://www.geocities.com/TelevisionCity/7366/  ... MURPHY'S LAW OF SEX: Love your neighbor, but don't get caught. ___ Blue Wave/386 v2.30 --- Silver Xpress Mail System 5.4H1 * Origin: RemoteAccess (64-3-3493236) V32B V42B CHCH,New Zealand (3:770/116) --------------- FIDO MESSAGE AREA==> TOPIC: 255 TAGLINES Ref: EGS00000 Date: 12/22/97 From: KIM LYKKEGAARD Time: 02:57am \/To: PAUL JENKIN (Read 2 times) Subj: Dupe! Hello PAUL. 21 Dec 97 13:37, PAUL JENKIN wrote to KIM LYKKEGAARD: KL>> It kill dupe like: KL>> DON'T SHOUT -- This conference is close-captioned KL>> Don't SHOUT --- This conference is close-captioned PJ> I take it that the prog involves some sort of a sorting alg? Well it depend one what you understand, if I shall explain (short and in general terms) It Takes a line, remove all char there isn't "abcdef..xyz" + "0-9" if you ask it. This way tag line like: "something" -- By Me "something" - By Me is reconiest as a dupe. Then I do my internal dupe checking on what line. PJ> I know the main problem with Tag-O-Matics dupe checking is the prog PJ> TSort, it sorts in a case sensitive fashion, so the likes of the PJ> examples you showed would be left... Well I have made case sensitive as a switch - I don't know why anyone would use it, but now they can't complain about what :) PJ> Does it contain something to remove email addresses? ie the line PJ> contains '.com', '.co.nz' '.org' '.co.uk' '.net' etc Nope, I just made it as a dupe killer (and a token translator, because i wanted that function :) I have don that stuff in a another program, and i will not take long to rewrite a function like what, if you or anyone else want it. Just say so. PJ> Origin lines? Well I thing tag and origin line is alike - origin line is limit to about (60-70 char). But what I meant was the program doesn't care if the text file is a tag file, and a origin collection. PJ> Tear lines? eg '---' '~~~' '-!-' PJ> The '...' and '.!.' that are sometimes at the start of the line in PJ> some tagfiles? PJ> Quoted lines? eg line has 'KL>' at the beginning I think you got some thing wrong here, this program doesn't collect tag/origin line, I leave it to other programs. I only look at a simple text file, and remove dupes from this file. It expect the file to be ONLY tag/origin lines. KL>> REDDWARF.TAG 36.610 23.585 PJ> I don't suppose you could post this could you? :) I will do what, look at the next msg. 8-) PJ> I don't have inet access, but if you could send it to PJ> Paul.Jenkin@johnnos.pl.net I should get it. Well ok. It's in the box. Med Venlig hilsen Kim ... During sex, you don't need to fantasize that I'm a blond, I AM one!!! --- MsgedKL 4.15 alfa 1 * Origin: Marcy killed it, Peg..... (2:235/203.26) --------------- FIDO MESSAGE AREA==> TOPIC: 255 TAGLINES Ref: EGS00001 Date: 12/22/97 From: KIM LYKKEGAARD Time: 03:20am \/To: PAUL JENKIN (Read 2 times) Subj: Reddwarf.tag KL>> REDDWARF.TAG 36.610 23.585 PJ> I don't suppose you could post this could you? :) ----- reddwarf.tag begins ----- "I was breeding that mold. Its name was Albert." - Lister "*That* will really help the centuries fly by." -- Rimmer "*This* is fun? Are you mad?" -- Rimmer "140,000 rehydratable chickens?" * Rimmer "Check." * Lister "3 Million years! I've still got that library book!" * Lister "3 million years in space, nothing! Then 5 suddenly show up!" "6000 IQ isn't that much." -- Holly "6000 isn't that much." - Holly. "A bomb!" - Lister. "A computer's got to do what a computer's got to do." -Holly. "A duplicate me!" - Rimmer. "A spacesuit with *cufflinks*?!" - Rimmer "A spacesuit with cuff links?" -- Lister "AAAAHHHH! My underpants are alive! They're shrinking!" "Abandon Shop. This is not a daffodil." -- Holly "Ace Rimmer. Space Corps." - Ace Rimmer. "Ah. So you're a waffle man!" - Talkie Toaster "Ahead groove factor 5! Yeah!" - Holly "All in all, today's been a bit of a bummer." - Kryten "All of this generosity has made me tired!" - The Cat "All we get is `Mind-that-bus-what-bus-SPLAT!'" - Rimmer "Alright, dudes- what's going down in groove town, then?" - Holly. "An android would never rip your head off!" - Kryten. "An excellent suggestion sir, with only two minor flaws...." - Kryten "And on that day, Lister, Satan will be skating to work." "And we get the android version of Norman Bates!" - Rimmer. "Another Hollywood pretty-boy..." - Mike Nelson "Another Red Dwarf Fan? It MUST be spreading as a disease!" "Any moment now." - Rimmer "April fools!" - Holly "But it's not April!" - Lister "Are you sure you're sanity chip is fully in?" -- Kryten "Are you sure your sanity chip is fully in?" - Kryten "Arnold J. Rimmer, BSC, SSC. Bronze Swimming Certificate." "Arnold Rimmer took the blame." - Kryten "As my owner, you have to die with me." - Kryten. "Assemble for inspection in 20 minutes." -- Rimmer "At least he gets 24 hours notice." - Rimmer "At least in prison you look forward to getting out." - Lister. "At least we got the matter panel back." - Kryten "Attack of the Hollywood Chainsaw Hookers!" "Better make myself look *big*!" - The Cat "Black card, Lister. Black card." - Rimmer "Boiled chicken ovulations, delicious." - Kryten. "Breakfast is served, sir." - Kryten "Brutal tattoo, man. What's it stand for? Heavy metal? - young Lister "Busy restarunt needs dish dirtier." -- Kryten "Busy restaurant needs dish dirtier." - Kryten. "But where do all the calculators go?" - Kryten "Call me by the nickname I had in school." "What, bonehead?" - Lister. "Clear?" - Holly. "No." - Lister. "Tough." - Holly. "Come on, what are you, a man or a munchkin?" - Lister "Computer senility. Such a weird condition." "Dave Lister: Homo Sapien - Barely Human." "Dead? But I've been only gone for 2 minutes!" - Kryten. "Death isn't the handicap it used to be." -- Lister "Death? It's like being on holiday with a group of Germans." "Did someone say they wanted toast?" -- Talkie Toaster "Do you have a cat?" - Captain Hollister. "Dog? What's a dog?" -- The Cat "Don't ask." -- The Cat "Don't forget to write!" - Rimmer #2. "Don't poison my sound waves." - Rimmer "Don't you remember me?" - Rimmer. "Eight weeks painting the ship!" - Rimmer "Emergency! Emergency! There's an emergency going on!" - Holly "Engage panic Circuits. Panic circuits engaged. AAARRRGh!" - Kryten. "Even with an IQ of 6000 it's still brown trousers time." - Holly. "Everybody's dead... Everybody's dead, Dave." - Holly "Everybody, everybody's dead, everybody's dead Dave." - Holly "Everyone who is alive, please raise your hand. See, told ya," - Rimmer. "Everything's backwards!" - Rimmer. "Everything's opposite to our universe!" - Lister "F-I-S-H. That's how you spell fish, Rimmer." -- Lister "FidoNet Just *is* - it's a Zen thing." - Holly Sullivan. "Fight that flab!" - Lister. "Fish!" - The Cat "Enjoy your meal." - Food Dispenser "Five days to get to and from the cargo decks?" - Rimmer "Five fish! I'll be rich!" - The Cat "Freeze! Thank you very much." - Wax Elvis "Fun, fun, fun, in the sun, sun, sun..." "GASPATCHO SOUP!" - Rimmer. "Generals don't smash chairs over people's heads!" * Rimmer "Get Kryten!" - Lister. "Get the spacesuit." -- Rimmer "Glory or insanity awaits..." - Rimmer "Go on, have a guess." - Holly. "Going to see `Jaws'?" - Lister "Green with apricot? That just might work!" - The Cat "Hands up!" -- Wax Hitler "Happy DeathDay to Rimmer." - Lister, Cat, & Holly "Have you seen a man who's lost his luggage?" -- Suitcase "He is. That was his first move" - Holly. "He said you were a fish." - Lister. "He thought a glacier was a bloke who fixed windows!" - Rimmer "He wants you to eat toast all the time!" - Lister. "He's a Smeeeeeeeeeee..." - Kryten "He's a smeg... head!" "He's right. You are a smeghead." - Lister. "Here Mousie! I only want to be your friend!" - The Cat "Hey! You're ill!" -- The Cat "Hey, what's that? It my shadow!" -- The Cat "Hi! I'm the Cat!" "Hi. I'm the genetic mutant." "Higher than a hippy the 3rd day of an open air festival." - Kryten. "His idea of fun is folding sheets!" - Rimmer "His name is Rimmer. Or Smeghead. Or Molecule-mind. Or..." "His opposite is a Dog, not a Cat." - Lister "Hmmm. Interesting." - Kryten "Holly! You're a genius!" -- Lister "Holly's sensed a non-human life form" "It's Rimmer!" "Holly, did Rimmer ever work in Garbage Disposal?" - Lister. "Holly, plot a course for Fiji." - Lister "Holly, why do we have you running things?" - Rimmer. "Holly, you jumped-up fil-o-fax!" - Rimmer "How 'bout a muffin?" -- Talkie Toaster "How am I looking? I'm looking better than nice!" -- The Cat "How am I looking? Looking *nice*!" - The Cat "How are you feeling, Mr. Lister, sir?" - Kryten "How are you going to pay for that" * Rimmer "You are." * Lister "How are you going to pay for that" -- Rimmer "How can you make a spacesuit look like evening wear?" "How would they sell their latest models?" - Kryten. "How's it gonna transport me?" - Rimmer "I *don't* care. You're the one who's doing the dying!" - Cat "I *have* taken the astronavigation exams... NINE times." - Rimmer. "I am Kryten of Borg: It's against my programming to assimilate a human." "I am Lister of Borg: I wish I'd assimilated Christine Kachansky." "I am Queeg." - Holly "I am Rimmer of Borg: You would be assimilated if you weren't a git!" "I am Toaster of Borg: Care for some toast before you're assimilated." "I am Toaster of Borg: It is useless to resist my offerings of toast. " "I am Toaster of Borg: Resistance is useless. You will eat toast." "I am your god!" - Lister "I believe in aliens!" - Rimmer. "I can lie." - Kryten "I can't _believe_ that I said that!" - Rimmer "I can't believe it! He's fighting with Adolf Hitler!" - Rimmer "I can't lie?" - Kryten "I can't say I'm surprised." - Rimmer. "I cannot believe I just said that" - Rimmer "I could hardly believe my nose!" - Lister. "I do believe I'm drunk." - Kryten "I gave you AMPLE bracing time." - Rimmer. "I got everything up to the part about `Now listen closely'" - The Cat. "I have an IQ of 6,000: The same IQ as 6,000 P.E. Teachers." "I have an IQ of 6,000: The same IQ as 6,000 P.E. Teachers." - Holly. "I have an examination tomorrow which I intend to pass." "I haven't the software to deal with this!" - Kryten "I just wanted to say... You're a total smeghead!" - Rimmer's father "I knew I was lying." - Kryten "I know you're dead Rimmer, don't whinge-on about it!" - Lister "I know you're dead, but you're still a smeghead." * Lister "I know you're omnipotent, but you're still a smeghead." - Lister to Q. "I learned to fly in Starbug 2, not 1!" "They're the same." "I lied twice" - Simulant "I didn't think of that." - Lister "I must have sucked up a penny." - Kryten "I once knew an android whose middle name was 2Q4B." - Kryten. "I picked up the dice and threw two sixes." - Rimmer "I said touch *nothing*!" - Rimmer. "I should have worn white... it goes with everything!" - The Cat "I suppose I should have updated the system." - Holly. "I suppose in many ways I should have updated the system, really" - Holly "I think... I think I'm... rebelling" - Kryten "I toast, therefore I am." - Talkie Toaster "I took the entire room!" - Lister. "I want my own memory back." * Rimmer "I want that cat and I want it NOW!" - Capt. Hollister. "I want to learn a new language." - Rimmer "I was breeding this mold. His name was Albert." -- Lister "I was in love once - a Sinclair ZX-81..." - Holly "I win by default." - Rimmer "I wish I was someone else. Then I could kiss myself." -- Cat "I wonder how I'm looking now? Still nice!" -- The Cat "I'd go back to last tuesday." -- Kryten "I'd love to, ... but the Potato King won't let me." - Rimmer "I'll get my own breakfast, thank you." - Lister. "I'm Queeg 500, the Red Dwarf backup computer." - Queeg "I'm a genius again!" - Holly "I'm alive!" - Rimmer. "I'm bleeding an unfashionable color!" - The Cat "I'm blow-drying my hair!" -- The Cat "I'm claiming all of this as mine!" -- The Cat "I'm dead. Dead as a can of spam." - Rimmer. "I'm getting a part in the back of my hair!" -- The Cat "I'm going out like I came in, kicking and screaming." - Lister. "I'm going to remain calm." - Rimmer "I'm gonna eat you, little fishy!" - The Cat "I'm guessing it's a white hole." - Kryten "I'm human." - Kryten. "I'm looking better than nice! I'm looking... dangerous!" - Cat "I'm looking for a dream I had on the Dream Recorder" - The Cat "I'm looking nice, my shadow's looking nice... What a team!" "I'm not the lowest rank on this ship. What about the mice?" "I'm not the lowest rank on this ship. What about the mice?" * Lister "I'm prepared to take that risk!" - The Cat "I'm really getting the hang of this 'Lie Mode' now!" - Kryten "I'm sick of it!" - Lister. "I'm too flabby!" - Rimmer. Yes, fight that flab!" - Lister. "I'm* space crazy!" - Lister. "I've failed, haven't I." - Kryten "If Lister can do it, so can I." - Rimmer "If you want to dance, do it over there." - Rimmer. "Is Holly playing pool with Planets?" * Lister "Is that a cigarette you're smoking? No, it's a chicken." - Rimmer. "It appears my intelligence circuits have melted." - Kryten. "It appears my intelligence circuts have melted." -- Kryten "It is me, Cloister!" - Lister. "It says your father died peacefully in his jeep... sleep!" "It says your father died peacefully in his jeep... sleep!" - Lister "It turned me into Dwayne Dibbley, The Duke of Dork!" - The Cat. "It was almost interfering with the ceiling fan yesterday" "It was one of the first songs I ever wrote. I called it OM." - Lister "It's Bad Buddy!" -- The Cat "It's Holly Goweirdly!" "It's November. Nearly time for your Bath." * Rimmer "It's a cat book. You sniff the lines!" - The Cat "It's a garbage pod!" -- Rimmer "It's a garbage pod, Rimmer! It's a smeggin' garbage pod!" "It's a little box that goes zzzzzzt!" - Kryten. "It's a video of my death." * Rimmer "It's backwards for 'London' sir." - Kryten "It's dying time!" - Kryten's Replacement. "It's got nothing to do with past lives!" - Lister "It's just like I imagined, only much shorter!" - Kryten. "It's just like being there!" - Rimmer "It's like trying to find a fart in a jaccuzi." - Lister "It's mine! The fish is mine!" -- The Cat "It's not Cloister, it's Lister! Lister the stupid!" -- Lister "It's private!" - Rimmer "It's gone public." - The Cat "It's really going to be one of those days, isn't it?" - Rimmer "It's the King!" * Lister's Confidence "Just give me Kochanski!" - Lister. "Just imagine the floor is Queeg's Face!" - Rimmer "Just need something organic." - Holly. "KRYTEN! Unpack Rachel and get out the puncture repair kit!" - Rimmer. "Kryten, I'm an enlightened twenty-third century guy." - Lister. "Leaves us drifting in space!" - Rimmer "Let's erase our memories." * Lister "Lister and Mum. It's a dream come true." - Rimmer. "Lister, Don't hum, and don't make any noises." * Rimmer "Lister, I just saw you die." - Rimmer "Lister, do you have a cat?" - Captain Hollister "Lister, have you been in that marijuana gin again?" - Rimmer. "Lister, have you ever been hit over the head with a welding mallet?" "Lister, stop him! Queeg's making me fit!" - Rimmer "Lister, you're a nothing!" - Rimmer "Look out Earth, the slime's coming home!" * Lister "Lose my leg? None of my suits will fit!" -- The Cat "Lots of people have died and gone on to do really really well." "Mmmm, something smells good! It's me." -- The Cat "Mr. David, sir!" - Kryten. "My heavens...I'm Human..." - Kryten. "My optical circuits don't seem to have a zoom function." "My optical circuits don't seem to have a zoom function."-Kryten "My optical circuts don't seem to have a zoom function." "My optical circuts don't seem to have a zoom function." - Kryten "Name's Commander Rimmer. Ace Rimmer." -- Ace Rimmer "Name's Lincoln. Abe Lincoln." -- Wax Lincoln "Names, Places, Times. Arnold Rimmer, his locker, this morning!" "Nice cake." * Rimmer "It was supposed to be meatloaf." * Lister "Nice cake." -- Rimmer "It's supposed to be meat loaf." -- Lister "Nice jump!" -- The Cat "No way are these mine. These *bend*!" -- Lister "No way are these mine. These BEND!"(holding his underwear) * Lister "No, you gimboid!" - Rimmer "Nobody's flushing out my brain!" * Lister "Nobody's listening to you, Rimmer!" - Lister. "Not too little, not too much." - Lister "Now you have. It's stereo." - Rimmer "Of COURSE there's a "H" on my forehead you git, I'm DEAD!" * Rimmer "Of course there's a "H" on my forehead, you git! I'm dead!" "Of course you're tense, you rectum-faced pygmy!" - Rimmer. "Oh crap. Not you!" -- Lister "Oh, Lister. You've forgotten the color code!" -- Rimmer "Oh, Rimmer. You *are* a smeghead." - Todhunter "Oh, go on then. Shake your head and walk out!" - Lister. "Ok is NOT a threat, no matter how many a's you put on it." * Rimmer "Ok, so you're dead. You don't have to whinge on about it." - Lister. "Or I may have to eat you." -- The Cat "Out of 169 people, I rank 169." * Lister "Oxygen's for losers!" * Lister's confidence "Pinkles, Squirmy. Flib, Flab, Flubber."--Rimmer's Space Scout salute "Rescue him!" - Rimmer. "Rimmer even had to organize his own suprise Birthday party!" "Rimmer even had to organize his own surprise Birthday party!" "Rimmer even had to organize his own surprise Birthday party!" * Lister "Rimmer's dad died." - Lister. Well, I prefer chicken." - The Cat. "Rimmer, sir, you are a Smeghead." - Kryten "Rimmer, you can touch things!" "Why do you think I was so late!" "Rimmer, you're name was never Ace. Acehole, maybe." -- Lister "Samuel Morse invented Morse code. Plato invented the Plate." "Samuel Morse invented Morse code. Plato invented the Plate." * Holly "Screw down my diodes and call me Frank." - Kryten "See what I mean? Red with apricot!" -- The Cat "See what I mean? Red with aprocot!" -- The Cat "Sen-smeggin-sational..." - Rimmer "She always called me Rimmer. To rhyme with scum." - Rimmer. "She was cheap, she was stupid and she wouldn't load..." - Holly "Should have thought a bit harder about that speech, really..." - Rimmer "Show me some more of this Earth thing called kissing." - Lister. "Shut up and listen!" - Lister "Sir, my intelligence circuits have melted." - Kryten. "Sir,with the utmost respect,that is complete and utter shash." - Kryten. "Skutters don't have time off!" * Rimmer "Sleeping is my third favorite thing!" - The Cat "Smoke me a kipper !..... "what a guy" - Ace Rimmer visits Red Dwarf "So Lister can understand it." * Rimmer "Oh dear..." * Holly "So it works out then?" - Lister. "Eventually." - Kochanski. "So what else is new?" - Talkie Toaster "Some nice crisp, brown, buttered toast!" - Talkie Toaster "Somebody get me a tailor!" - The Cat "Someday the rains will come; my blistered hands tell me." "Something more splendid than heating bread." - Talkie Toaster "Sorry...I must have bypassed my good taste chip." - Kryten "Spin my nipple nuts and send me to Alaska!" - Kryten "Such a searing indictment of Hollywood..." - Crow T. Robot "Talk about weight off your mind!" - Lister "Thank heaven you've still got all your marbles." - Rimmer. "Thanks for your support." - Rimmer. "That was first-degree toastercide!" - Talkie Toaster "That was totally convincing, wasn't it?" - Kryten "That's Adolph Hitler- Leader of the runner up in WWII." - Rimmer "That's because I'm dead. Dead as a can of spam." - Rimmer "That's me in Slo-mo!" -- The Cat "That's mine and that's mine and that's mine..." - The Cat. "That's rich, you know, coming from Miss Yo-Yo Knickers." - Lister "That's why I had my appendix out... twice." - Rimmer "That's your excuse - being dead." * Lister "The 'H' stands for horrible, right?" * Lister's Confidence "The death ray would be good for Hollywood premiers." - Crow "The in-flight magazines will act as a sedative." - Lister "The in-flight magazines will act as a seditave." * Lister "The only notice we get is `Mind that bus-what bus-SPLAT!'" "The scene they always show on `That's Hollywood'..." - Nelson "There's nothing small about messing with time!" * Holly "These shoes look like Frankstein's hand-me-downs." - The Cat "They are wax replica's sir." - Kryten "They asked me what I did." "I said you were a shelf." "They asked me what I did." * Rimmer "I said you were a shelf." * Lister "They must have looked like roast chicken." - Rimmer. "They were laughing at me!" - Rimmer "They're dead!" "I was only away for 2 minutes!" "They're dead." * Rimmer "I was only away for 2 minutes!" * Kryten "Things are better here!" - Rimmer. "This banana is an orange." - Lister. "This bananna is an orange." -- Lister "This guy needed a video club card?" - Rimmer "This is a 'black card situation, end of conversation'." - Lister "This is a recording. I'm afraid Holly is busy at the moment." - Holly. "This is all your fault, you little glob of tuberculoid sputum." - Kryten. "This is an SOS Call from the mining ship Red Dwarf..." "This old baby's crashed more times than a ZX-81!" - Kryten. "This way!" -- The Cat "Tomorrow I'm gonna see if I can have sex with something." - The Cat. "Toy soldiers?" - Lister "Urine should only be green if you're Mr. Spock." - A. Rimmer. "Urine should only be green if you're Mr. Spock." -- Rimmer. "We could do a mind swap." - Kryten. "We found a stasis leak on Floor 16." - Rimmer "We're a success here, Lister" - Rimmer. "We're getting a signal." - Holly "We've got to do it by the book!" - Rimmer "Well to coin a phrase, Whoops!" - Kryten "Well, gentlemen--just enough time for me to say toodlie pipsky" - Rimmer "Well, it probably *is* deja vu. It sounds like it." -- Rimmer "What a guy!" - Lister "What am I going to do? I am programmed to serve." - Kryten "What am I wearing?" -- The Cat "What are we going to do about Kryten?" - Rimmer "What are you talking about, grease stain?" - The Cat "What did you see?" - Lister "Me!" - The Cat "What do you mean you `Killed him, cha-cha-cha'?" -- Lister "What do you see?" "Ugly black spots!" "What flavor milk shake?" -- Food Dispenser "Beer." -- Lister "What happened to him?" - Lister "What is it?" - Lister "It's an Orrrrrrrrr." - Kryten "What is this?" - Lister. "It's an apple." - Kryten. "What it it?" -- The Cat "What the SMEG!?!" - David Lister "What time is it?" * Lister "Saturday." * Rimmer "What's a Total Immersion Video Game?" - Rimmer "What's happening, dudes?" - Holly. "What's that fragrance?" - Kryten. "WD40." - Camille. "When I saw you for the first time," -- The Cat "Whenever you're around." - Cat. "Around." - Lister and Rimmer. "Whenever you're around." -- Cat "Around." -- Lister & Rimmer "Who woke him up?" - Holly "Why am I doing this?" - Lister "Why are you painting the walls the same color?" - Lister. "Why did you have to bring Rimmer back?" - Lister "Why do you have an IQ of 12,000?" -- Talkie Toaster "Why don't you hand your body in and let them mark that?" "Why don't you hand your body in and let them mark that?" - Lister "Why is it raining fish?" * Rimmer "Will you just try to get me some black coffee?" - Lister. "Would you like some toast?" - Talkie Toaster "Yeooow! I'm looking good today!" * Cat "Yeow! I'm looking good today!" - The Cat "Yes, I expect they cured death the instant we left Earth." "Yes, I expect they cured death the instant we left Earth." - Rimmer. "Yes, Mister Lister Sir! Practice, Rimmer, makes perfect." "Yes, Mister Lister Sir! Practice, Rimmer, makes perfect." - Lister "Yo, Todhunter! Get down!" -- Lister "You KNOW what happens when you call me 'tetchy'." - Kryten. "You Livies hate us Deadies." - Rimmer "You are going to invent the Tension Sheet." - Rimmer "You are uneasy. You have never sailed with *me* before, I see." "You better not miss!" - Rimmer "You borrowed money from me to buy me a birthday present!" "You borrowed money from me to buy me a birthday present!" * Lister "You call this happiness?" - Rimmer "You can access a third reality with this procedure!" "You can do anything!" - Lister's Confidence "You can hardly tell you have space mumps at all!" - Kryten "You can tell all that from a photograph?" - The Cat "You can't go there!" "Why Not?" "Orange? With this suit?" "You can't have my shiny thing!" * Cat "You can't sing you know." - Talkie Toaster "You can't whack death over the head!" - Rimmer. "You didn't have the right parents? Whose did you have?" * Lister "You followed me!" - Rimmer. "You guys have got to be yanking my chain!" - Lister "You must obey the company's regulations, and out here, I am." "You must think me as stupid as a photocopier." - Kryten. "You really can clone yourself from your dandruff?" * Cat "You really can clone yourself from your dandruff?" - The Cat "You should have finished on a song!" * Cat "You should read your shirt. It's probably a novel!" * Rimmer "You sound like a TV series!" * Rimmer "You spoke to 5 people and they all comitted suicide!" * Lister "You taught Kryten that? You two should audition for What's my fruit! "You're born and you die. The bit in between is called life." - Lister. "You're copying the whole textbook onto your body" * Lister "You're going to fry an egg with a Hair Dryer?" * Lister "You're just going to say no, right Rimmer?" - Lister. "You're space crazy." - Rimmer. "Your Kryten android is nearing the end of it's life." "Your bucket's been kicked, baby." - Rimmer. "Your buckets being kicked, baby!" "Your name was never Ace. Maybe Ace-Hole." * Lister "Your stomach's growling." "My stomach's rotting." "we have in our midst a complete smegpot!" - Dave Lister "That was for saving my cat." -- Catwoman, BTAS And on that day, Lister, Satan will be skating to work. --Rimmer. ListerDOS 6.0: (E)at curry, (D)rink lager, (N)eglect to wash underpants. ListerDOS: (G)rab bazookoid, (O)ptimism mode-grin, (A)sk Holly Origin: The mining ship Red Dwarf Pearls-o-wisdom from Mr. Fried-Egg-Chili-Chutney Sandwich Face. Rameses Niblick III, Ker-plunk, Ker-plunk, Whoops Where's My Thribble? RimmerDOS 6.0: (G)oit, (G)it, (G)imboid, (G)imp, (A)ll of the above. You gimboid, that's a Blue Wave headed for the Red Dwarf! ----- reddwarf.tag ends ----- Med Venlig hilsen Kim ... Do sexy electrons have current affairs? --- MsgedKL 4.15 alfa 1 * Origin: Marcy killed it, Peg..... (2:235/203.26)