--------------- FIDO MESSAGE AREA==> TOPIC: 231 RECOVERY Ref: E4U00000 Date: 04/23/97 From: JEREMY HARANY Time: 06:17am \/To: KEVIN QUAST (Read 0 times) Subj: Lowered Stakes * Reply to msg originally in Fidonet: 12 Steps Discussion / Sharing -=> Quoting Kevin Quast to Jeremy Harany <=- KQ> A personal question here for you. You say that now the stakes are KQ> lower, it's a little scary. Could you elaborate? Do you mean that now KQ> that you've got less to lose by drinking you are afraid you might KQ> drink? Or am I misunderstanding you? In what way are the stakes lower KQ> now? No...you're right on the button. When I first decided to give up all my addictions, it was primarily because of my relationship at the time. The first real, pure love I had ever felt, and she had two, wonderful children. It seemed that the sky was the limit, and all I had to do was sacrifice a few bad habits. Hey, it was well worth it... Now we are no longer together, we've had a son, she's in one part of town, I in the other. So life is just life again...kinda lonely, sometimes boring. No longer do I have to worry about supporting a family of five, no longer do I have to worry about setting good example to my children (I still consider them ALL to be mine), no longer do I have to worry about coming home within anybody's guidlines, etc etc etc... So I have to be careful, I find. It's just much to easy to slip into old patterns when, as you've said, "there's less to loose." In many ways I've already lost it, so who cares? I'm being mildly sarcastic, but that's what this little voice in the back of my head whispers once in a while. I haven't completly fallen off the wagon, but it IS harder to stay on. It's like all of a sudden that wagon is bouncing over a bunch of really big speed bumps... Anyway, I feel strong about it...just a little concerned... Enough about me. I'm glad you're doing well, you sound very confident and self-assured. I can draw strength from that, my friend, so I thank you. Take care, and here's wishing you another 24... ... ARRRRRGGGHHH!!!! ... Tension breaker, had to be done. --- Blue Wave/386 v2.30 [NR] * Origin: /* CR/2 */ Edmonton, AB, CAN. 33.6 v34+. 403-453-5711 (1:342/5011) --------------- FIDO MESSAGE AREA==> TOPIC: 231 RECOVERY Ref: E4V00000 Date: 04/25/97 From: MATRIKA Time: 12:11pm \/To: MARIE WEIDEMANN (Read 0 times) Subj: Re: Sponsorees re - I forgot you are battling your OA problem, will send the light to aid you - Ah, so this is your doing? I have the flu so bad I can't eat or even drink any liquids right now. (BIG GRIN -although I do have the flu, I'm most certain it's not your doing) --- TriToss (tm) Professional 11.0 - #66 * Origin: Keystone BBS * Shrewsbury, MA * 508-753-3767 (1:322/743.0) --------------- FIDO MESSAGE AREA==> TOPIC: 231 RECOVERY Ref: E4V00001 Date: 04/25/97 From: MATRIKA Time: 12:14pm \/To: STATELINER (Read 0 times) Subj: Re: Sponsorees re - thanks for your congratulations - my heart goes out to the Al-Anoner whose husband slipped, major bummer that! Just when you think you've put the nightmare of an actively alcoholic behind you and found a stabler life, boom - the disease is in your face again saying "I got you buster". Talk about cunning, baffling and insidious. --- TriToss (tm) Professional 11.0 - #66 * Origin: Keystone BBS * Shrewsbury, MA * 508-753-3767 (1:322/743.0) --------------- FIDO MESSAGE AREA==> TOPIC: 231 RECOVERY Ref: E5100000 Date: 05/01/97 From: MARIE WEIDEMANN Time: 05:08am \/To: MATRIKA (Read 0 times) Subj: Re: Sponsorees Matrika - The wind whispered your name to me... Ma> re - I forgot you are battling your OA problem, will send the light to Ma> aid you - Ah, so this is your doing? I have the flu so bad I can't Ma> eat or even drink any liquids right now. (BIG GRIN -although I do have Ma> the flu, I'm most certain it's not your doing) Look at it this way...if you can't eat, it is helping you battle your problem...:) I don't think the light works that way..just the good way.. I hope you feel better... Light, Love and Laughter Marie - Starwitch Walk with the Light.... ... Life is like an hourglass. Consciousness is the sand. ___ Blue Wave/QWK v2.12 --- GEcho 1.00 * Origin: Phoenix Rising*Wilkes-Barre PA*Starwitch (717)822-2017 (1:268/442) --------------- FIDO MESSAGE AREA==> TOPIC: 231 RECOVERY Ref: E5100001 Date: 05/01/97 From: MARIE WEIDEMANN Time: 05:08am \/To: ALL (Read 0 times) Subj: Rules RECOVERY ECHOMAIL CONFERENCE - FidoNet -- Status: RECOVERY is a moderated conference carried on the FidoNet Backbone. RECOVERY is an "open forum" type conversational conference for the discussion of topics related to addictions and recovery from them; also, announcements of RECOVERY related gatherings (conferences, workshops, speaker meetings, etc.) are in order. [The above paragraph does not really LIMIT the topics SINCE we ALL drank or used (or whatever word you choose) over anything and every- thing at one time or another.] RECOVERY is for those involved in the various "12 Step" recovery programs, as well as for those WHO ARE not involved in a recovery program but WHO HAVE a desire to deal with recovery from THEIR additive BEHAVIOR AND ARE INTERESTED IN CONVERSING WITH THOSE WHO ARE INVOLVED IN 12 STEP PROGRAMS. This includes AA, NA, Al-Anon, OA, EA, SLAA and many other such 12-step-BASED groups. -- Rules: Darned few! Promotion of "commercial ventures" such as treatment facilities or clinics is not in order. General rules of social conduct are always in order. Repeated "abusive/annoying" messages * may draw comment from the moderator or be brought to the attention * of the Moderator by other conference participants. * ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ NOTE: As RECOVERY is not a part of or affiliated with _ANY_ recovery program, attempting to impose traditions, membership requirements, etc. of any specific program is out of order. To SysOps: Please refrain from posting "test" messages in this conference. The additional traffic of tests and the resulting replies is not desirable. ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ ** It is OK to give a [business not another members] address or telephone number in response to a direct request from a co-user of the echo, without further comment (no price listing or list of items etc). Just in passing:- These statements, used to guide SysOps, might well be mentioned here for all callers to note. 1.) You shall not be excessively ANNOYING. 2.) You shall not be too easily ANNOYED. ----------- Marie Weidemann, AKA Starwitch Moderator of the Recovery Echo ___ Blue Wave/QWK v2.12 --- GEcho 1.00 * Origin: Phoenix Rising*Wilkes-Barre PA*Starwitch (717)822-2017 (1:268/442) --------------- FIDO MESSAGE AREA==> TOPIC: 231 RECOVERY Ref: E5300000 Date: 05/02/97 From: MATRIKA Time: 12:20pm \/To: MARIE WEIDEMANN (Read 0 times) Subj: Re: Sponsorees I know the light doesn't work that way. I was being sort of funny - sometimes I have to or I'll cry. I do think the light is doing something - I got over this in record time for me. I also used all kinds of herbal, vitamin and other folk remedies - as well as an anti-biotic because I needed it, with spiritual remedies such as meditation. But I'm sure the light and love I got from some friends and the prayers and love I got from others were a great help. . I do believe prayer and meditation is the part of the program of recovery that is most important to me today, on a daily basis. In many ways the other steps I've already taken except for this and the tenth and the twelfth which are on-going. I use the tenth in a way that works for me, periodically, as I feel I need it - or as my sponsor does. And the 12th I try to do in my daily life - but it's not a conscious process for me all the time, it's just the way I live now - or try to. I definitely don't always succeed and that is where I tend to become aware of it - because I become aware of the failure and the disruption it makes in my serenity. For me, it's sort of an "ought oh, I f***ed up good this time" response. (GRIN) . But the 11th takes a conscious effort on a daily basis and so it's more a part of my conscious life than any other step at this time. As far as the part of the 12th that talks about carrying the message, this also comes naturally for me. This is because, for me, if I don't share, my own serenity goes whacko and forces me to do it again - in one media or another. I do it for myself, to keep me clean and sober. When it actually does help someone else, that's an amazing fringe benefit. . I got a great joke to tell you, but will do so on the other echo. . BY THE WAY, GOOD BELTANE, MILADY --- TriToss (tm) Professional 11.0 - #66 * Origin: Keystone BBS * Shrewsbury, MA * 508-753-3767 (1:322/743.0) --------------- FIDO MESSAGE AREA==> TOPIC: 231 RECOVERY Ref: E5B00000 Date: 05/05/97 From: CHUCK BISESI Time: 08:12am \/To: HAROLD DUGGAN (Read 0 times) Subj: First things first Hello Harold HD> First things first I should say hello to everybody....My name HD> is harold and I am an alcoholic/addict depending on what HD> meeting I am at. I'm Chuck and I'm an alcoholic from the North Coast in Berea, Ohio. HD> I used both alcohol and drugs for the same HD> purpose...to hide from life, Sounds to me like you belong here. Pull up a chair and jump in anytime. HD> I have been in continuous recovery since Jan. 24 1990 and I am HD> greatful to the programs of recovery I have been in, to the HD> people and most of all to my Higher Power whom I call God for HD> my daily reprieve. Jan 24th is a good date. It's my BB birthday, the one my mother used to celebrate. The birthday my family and I celebrate is Jan 22. We used to drive her crazy with that. She never understood about AA. The only thing she knew was I didn't drink anymore. Where are you from Harold? God Bless Make God laugh. Tell him your plans for today. ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ Chuck Bisesi ChuckB@now-online.com ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ --- * Origin: 1st Things 1st, Berea, Ohio (1:157/2.5) --------------- FIDO MESSAGE AREA==> TOPIC: 231 RECOVERY Ref: E5B00001 Date: 05/05/97 From: MARTIN WAXMAN Time: 09:09pm \/To: ALL (Read 0 times) Subj: Bye Bye I am sorry to say that I am leaving fidonet as a result of the lack of traffic here. It is a sad thing that this had to happen but my uplink will soon be doing the same. However I do have a Compuserve adress and an AOL adress that I am reachable at. I will leave my AOL adress, as I do not know how much longer I will have both of them. AOL Adress: MJW557 Hope to see some of you there. Marty --- msgedsq 2.0.4 * Origin: Marty's Place Mesa, AZ (1:114/136.4) --------------- FIDO MESSAGE AREA==> TOPIC: 231 RECOVERY Ref: E5B00002 Date: 05/04/97 From: HAROLD DUGGAN Time: 12:39pm \/To: ALL (Read 0 times) Subj: First things first First things first I should say hello to everybody....My name is harold and I am an alcoholic/addict depending on what meeting I am at. I used both alcohol and drugs for the same purpose...to hide from life, and now I go to meetings and pray like heck to try to deal with life and some days it seems like its all for naught and some days its great. I have been in continuous recovery since Jan. 24 1990 and I am greatful to the programs of recovery I have been in, to the people and most of all to my Higher Power whom I call God for my daily reprieve. Anyway this is a little bit of who I am....Who Are You? --- Maximus 2.01wb * Origin: Communicate Now - Night Wolf BBS (78:519/400) (1:221/1002) --------------- FIDO MESSAGE AREA==> TOPIC: 231 RECOVERY Ref: E5E00000 Date: 05/06/97 From: RICK BALDWIN Time: 09:15am \/To: MATRIKA (Read 0 times) Subj: Thanks > But when does the Joy of living kick back in? That's what I want to > know. (GRIN) (As in the Joy of living being the theme of AA's twelve > steps as quoted in step 12 of the 12 and 12.) Hi Matrika. I replied to this a few weeks ago, but I've been using a new mail reader and it's possible that I lost some of my replies. So...if you never ot an answer, please accept my apoligy! Anyway, when does the *joy* kick in? Well, it seems to come slowly...in ittle bitty bites, sometimes. I know for me, I feel a little more complete, a ittle more fulfilled, as I remind myself that I am making some progress in my struggle. I also have to keep reminding myself that I don't have to be perfect, because I am a human being, and all human beings are imperfect. We all mess up from time to time. And finally, as I learn to accept myself and be comfortable with my imperfections, I find I can relax and be more open with others...and urprise, I find out that many times others will accept me just as I am. I hope this makes *some* sense! ttyl... -- SPEED 2.00 [NR]: Genius is perserverence in disguise. --- Platinum Xpress/Win/Wildcat5! v2.0 * Origin: LindenRoom BBS (901) 458-9001 (1:123/215)